


Just Another Paradox

by JulianAlbertsCat (AdhdBarryAllen)



Series: AllenbertWeek2017 [1]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Allenbert Week 2017, Angst, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, One-Sided Relationship, Pre-Flashpoint (DCU), Pre-Flashpoint Relationship, Unrequited Love, barry why, im sorry my heart is broken too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-29
Updated: 2017-01-29
Packaged: 2018-09-20 17:34:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9502616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AdhdBarryAllen/pseuds/JulianAlbertsCat
Summary: Love comes at a costBut nothing’s ever lostIt's just another paradox





	

_And dark was never just for us_

_Takin' all the falls, try and make it last_

_But it too, my love shall pass_

**As You Are // Kimbra**

 

 

_“So, see you for dinner at six, then?”_

_“Of course, Jul. Wouldn't miss it for the world.”_

+++

As he skidded to a stop at the West’s house, one thing played in his mind on repeat:

_Everything is okay everything is okay everything is okay everything is—_

Spoilers: everything was not okay.

He had been so relieved to see Wally and Joe alive and well, but then at mentioning Iris, Joe had shut down. What had he _done_? Had fixing the timeline killed his best friend?

“You know they don't talk anymore,” Wally told him.

Barry let out a sigh of relief. That had to mean she was alive, but he had no way of finding out more without telling them he had changed the timeline. That probably wasn't the best idea. Who knew what else he had ruined?

“I— I have to go,” Barry offered weakly, flashing out of the house.

He ran without destination, but eventually wound up at STAR Labs. Sleeping here for the night seemed more appealing than his room at Joe’s. Assuming he still _had_ a room, that is.

He settled down on one of the spare beds and prayed to fall asleep quickly; if he didn't, this mistake would keep him up forever.

+++

He strolled into work with his usual coffee and incredibly exhausted.

Barry had tried desperately to sleep last night, but the beds at STAR Labs weren't particularly comfortable and his mind hadn't been able to stop thinking about what he’d done. He’d had to see his mother killed for the third time, only this time, he had _asked_ for it.

Joe caught up to him, and Barry tried to make some sense out of what had happened to the timeline, but he only got a few vague answers about why Joe and Iris weren't speaking.

“We found another husk this morning,” Joe told him as they approached the entrance of his lab.

“...Husk?” Barry asked hesitantly.

“Singh wants his processed ASAP,” Joe said, but not to Barry. Joe placed the evidence bag in the basket on the desk, and for the first time, Barry noticed that this lab was not the same.

His eyes fell on the nameplate of a desk that hadn't been there before. _Julian Albert, Meta-Human CSI Specialist._

Who?

“Yes, the skin husks we’ve been finding all over the city; the ones we think are attached to the metahumans,” a man with a British accent said.

Barry glanced around at what had been his lab. His desk had moved, but a glance at the second nameplate assured him that this was still partially his lab. Having dropped off the sample, Joe made his exit, leaving Barry alone with a stranger.

“So, _Allen,_ ” This Julian guy practically spat. “How is it that you're able to make it to work on time, but you can't manage to make it to our _date_.”

Barry felt frozen to the spot. Why was he being yelled at? He hadn’t _done_ anything. This… metahuman expert wasn't making any sense. What _date_? He let out a nervous laugh. “I'm sorry, are we dating?”

Julian’s eyes slammed shut, his jaw clenching as if he had just taken a punch to the gut. His expression was resigned. Defeated. As if he had been expecting this.

“There are easier ways to reject a fellow,” Julian quipped with a shake of his head.

Barry knew he should say something, but the words were caught in his throat. He couldn’t tell this man the truth without revealing himself as The Flash. What was he supposed to do? He was supposed to be with Iris, not some mystery Englishman who hadn’t existed till last night.

“Look, we had some fun, but I don’t think it’s going to work out.” Barry said. The words burned his throat. They felt so plain and scripted, but they would cut like knives.

“So, that’s it then?” Julian asked in a small voice. Barry looked away, confirming with a shrug of his shoulders. Julian sighed, running a hand over his face. “Maybe I should find a separate place to do my work.”

Barry couldn’t bring himself to watch as the man whose heart he has just broken packed up his things, leaving him alone in a lab that, for a few minutes, he had shared.

He should have never come back from the timeline.

**Author's Note:**

> First and foremost I would like to say I'M SORRY  
> Second, [here's a link to the title song.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xhlxn385QIc) It's really good.   
> Thanks for reading, come say hi on [tungle!](http://adhd-barry-allen.tumblr.com)


End file.
